Mad, Mad Men

Funny Mad Men quotes to brighten your day

If you're a fan of Mad Men quotes, I don't have to tell you about this unexpectedly and wildly successful show. Ever since it burst onto the scene, fans have followed its tongue-in-cheek exploits with avid interest. But it's not just meticulous storylines, excellent acting, and interesting characters that makes Mad Men a success: it's the razor-sharp wit and hilarious writing.

If you're already a Mad Men fan, you won't need any more introduction -- and if you're not, here's a glimpse of what you're missing!

1. "What you call love was invented by guys like me to sell nylons."

2. "This is why I don't allow crying in the break room. It erodes morale. There's a place to do that, like your apartment."

3. "But that's life. One minute you're on top of the world, the next minute some secretary's running you over with a lawnmower."

4. "Now that I can finally understand you, I am less impressed with what you have to say."

5. "I don't care what your politics are, this is America. You don't just shoot the President."

6. "You know what? I have good ideas. In fact, I used to carry around a notebook and a pen, just to keep track. Direct marketing? I thought of that. It turned out it already existed, but I arrived at it independently. And then I come to this place, and you people tell me that I'm good with people, which is strange, because I'd never heard that before."

7. "If you don't like what's being said, change the conversation."

8. "Well, I gotta go learn a bunch of people's names before I fire them."

9. "I keep going to a lot of places and ending up somewhere I've already been."

10. "I'd have my secretary do it, but she's dead."

11. "If I'm going to die, I want to die in Manhattan."

12. "Sometimes when people get what they want, they realize how limited their dreams were."

13. "Kids today, they have no one to look up to cause they're looking up to us."

Mad Men is easily one of the wittiest, strangest shows to dominate the networks in the last five years -- and thank goodness it's around to give us our dose of drama, scandal, and chuckles. I hope you enjoy these Mad Men quotes as much the second time around!

For more funny quotes, check out the popular funny quotes section at, a website that specializes in 'Top 10' lists of quotations in dozens of categories.