While most of us are familiar with Letterman and his brand of comedy on Late Night... did you also know his company is Worldwide Pants? The production company that brought us a bazillion laughs in Everybody Loves Raymond? Mr. Letterman seems focused on bringing laughter into the average American home daily. So whether you love him as a son of the Midwest, a savvy political satirist, or a brother surviving in New York, celebrate his April birth revisiting some David Letterman quotes.
1. "For the love of God, folks, don't try this at home."
2. "They have demonstrated superb taste by giving me my own show and it's humbling that they recognize my unequaled genius."
3. "This just gives you an idea of what a big, big star this really is, ... She's huge. Put bygones behind us, the water under the bridge, over the dam, wherever water goes standing in your basement she's going to be here on this show and it's going to be fantastic."
4. "Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees."
5. "There is a new billboard outside Time Square. It keeps an up-to minute count of gun-related crimes in New York. Some goofball is going to shoot someone just to see the numbers move."
6. "There's no business like show business, but there are several businesses like accounting."
7. "USA Today has come out with a new survey - apparently, three out of every four people make up 75% of the population."
8. "Sometimes when you look in his eyes you get the feeling that someone else is driving."
9. "A pair of ruby red slippers worn by Judy Garland in The Wizard of Oz have been stolen. The thief is described as being armed and fabulous."
10. "Based on what you know about him in history books, what do you think Abraham Lincoln would be doing if he were alive today?1) Writing his memoirs of the Civil War.2) Advising the President.3) Desperately clawing at the inside of his coffin."
11. "The worst tempered people I have ever met were those who knew that they were wrong."
12. "Here's what the kids get. They get free McDonald's and Kentucky Fried Chicken for a year, and 52 six-packs of Pepsi. And I'm thinking, well, actually, it might be healthier if they were taking steroids."
I was in 3rd grade when a friend of mine spouted water through a gap in her front teeth and said, "See I'm like David Letterman." It was the first time I had heard of him. I made it a point to sneak down and watch the following week. I heard my mom cackling her head off and he's been a bright spot in my late night television viewing ever since. So happy birthday... David Letterman quotes always make me laugh.
For more funny quotes, check out the popular funny quotes section of Famous-Quotes-And-Quotations.com, a website that specializes in 'Top 10' lists of quotations in dozens of categories.